Chats
by Abreu7
Summary: The Titans are always talking, but what about? This is the comedy packed fanfic telling just what! Who would've thought, even superheros talk about everyday things like commercials!
1. Commercials

**Hi! I've had this idea for quite some time now, and I'm finally writing it! The titans talk all the time, well, lets see just what they're talking about!**

**Commercials**

The titans were watching TV together, when it cut to commercial.

Beast Boy: Dude! I just hate commercials!

Starfire: I agree! The 'commercials' squander much of our viewing time!

Cyborg:O.o I don't know half of what she just said, but ditto.

Beast Boy: And look! The kids are evil in commercials!

Raven: *Raises an eyebrow* How so?

Beast Boy: Well, look! *Points to the screen, a trix commercial* I don't understand why they don't just give the rabbit the trix already! Its just cereal!

Raven: I'm surprised you understand anything *Smirks* But....thats actually a good point.....

Beast Boy: HAH!

Cyborg: QUIT IT! I think the shows back!

*Commercials ends, but now Lucky Charms commercial starts*

Cyborg: Aww man.

Beast Boy: See?? This is another example! The kids are hunting the leprechaun, trying to get the cereal! Its just CEREAL!

Starfire: Yes! And why can they not simply ask nicely?

Beast Boy: EXACTLY! Dude, all he's trying to do is eat some cereal when these kids pop out with a net!

Robin: I'm back!

Raven: O.o When did you leave?

Robin: Near the beginning, thats why I haven't been talking.

Cyborg: *clears throat* Um... ya'll...

Beast Boy: Hang on, *rants on about evil cereal kids*

Starfire: But Beast Boy....

Beast Boy: Trying to make a point here! *Continues rant*

Robin: Beast Boy the-

Beast Boy: WAIT! *Continues*

Raven: *Slaps Beast Boy on the back of head* Show's back!.....*Muttering*Idiot.....

The other titans grin, then settle in to continue watching their show.

**HAHAHAHA I really loved writing the ending, it just kind of seemed really in character. Hoped you enjoyed it!**

**~Abreu7~**

**PS I'll be updating this at random times or whenever I get an idea for it. Its going to be my "Writer's Block" outlet**


	2. Safety

**Heres the 2nd chapter!**

**Safety**

The titans were looking through their mail when they recieved, of all things, a SAFETY flier.

Cyborg:*burst out laughing*

Raven: Do they really expect us to worry about safety?

Robin: We battle psychiotic villians, crazy witches, and madmen, and they're worried about safety?

Starfire: Yes! Also, I do not understand the term "Safety first"

Beast Boy: Whats there to understand? O.o

Starfire: Would putting on your 'seat belt' when entering an automotive vehicle qualify as 'safety'?

Robin: Sure Star, but where are you going with this?

Starfire: Simply because safety is _not _first. To put on the seatbelt, first you must open the vehicle. Then you must enter it, and _then _you put on the 'seat belt'. So why do they say safety is first when it is not?

Cyborg: No, Star, its an expression. When they say "Safety first." they mean..well...uh.. what DO they mean again ya'll?

Robin: They mean you should worry about your safety first.

Starfire: But how can you worry of the safety if you can not enter the vehicle?

Raven: *sighs*

Beast Boy: Star, safety _is _first.

Starfire: *blinks* How so? *tilts her head in confusion*

Beast Boy: Before you turn on the car, what do you do?

Starfire: You must enter it.

Beast Boy: NO! DUDE! Before you start up, you put on your seatbelt!

Starfire: Yes, but before putting on the seatbelt you must enter the vehicle.

Beast Boy: *Sweatdrops* I GIVE UP!

Cyborg: Why don't we just go get some pizza and forget about this?

Robin: Alright!

Beast Boy: Yea!

Raven: Sure.

Starfire: I would like mine with extra mustard please!

And the titans exit, anticipating their pizza.

**I always thought about that. Safety definately ISN'T first. ^^**

**~Abreu7~**


	3. Names

**Heres the 3rd chapter!**

**Names**

The titans were sitting, with Raven and Beast Boy quarreling, when Raven spat out the name: Garfield!

Beast Boy: *Blushes* Well, whats YOUR name, Rae?

Raven: Raven. So quit calling me Rae.

Beast Boy: Seriously. Don't you have a name?

Raven: Did you nut just hear me? My. Name. Is. Raven.

Robin: *Confused* Raven, thats your hero name. Don't you have a real one?

Raven: No.

Starfire: But, Starfire is my name and my "Hero" name as well, so me and Raven are similiar, correct?

Robin: No, Starfire, whats your name on Tamaran?

Starfire: Koriand'r. *Continues in Tamaranian with super long name*

Robin: *Puts hands up* Stop! So your name is Kori and or. But your hero name is Starfire.

Starfire: No, my name is Koriand'r, not Kori and or.

Robin: Right. Kori and or.

Starfire pulled Robin away, to practice saying her name. Leaving Beast Boy, Cyborg, and Raven to talk.

Beast Boy: *Glances at Cyborg* So, whats your name?

Cyborg: Victor, Victor Stone.

Beast Boy: Dude! Why'd you get a cool name like *Deep voice* VICTOR STONE! While I got *Wimpy voice* Garfiled Logan...

Cyborg: *Chuckles* Cause I'm cooler you little grass stain.

Raven:And you're both morons.

Cyborg: Well, whats YOUR name then?!

Raven: Raven.

Beast Boy: What was your mom's name?

Raven, uncomfortable with being asked so many questions responds:

Raven: I'm going to go meditate. *Phases through floor*

Beast Boy: I can never get over how cool that is. O.o

Cyborg: Definately. Hey, wanna play a little 1 on 1? *Holds up game controller*

Beast Boy: You're on!

Meanwhile, with Starfire and Robin.

Starfire: Kooooooriiiiiiiiaaaand'rrrrrrrrr.

Robin: Yea, Koriand'r.

Starfire: Yay! You have understood! Now, may I ask what your name is, Robin?

Robin: It's

**Sorry folks! we're all outta time!**

**HAHAHA I didn't tell you Robin's or Rae's name for a reason! I realizes Raven goes by "Rachel Roth" but thats in the COMICS. This is the TV show! BB's name was revealed (Ep. Homecoming Part II), so was Cyborg's (Epp. "Deception", he takes on the name "Stone") and so was Star's (Ep. "Betrothed"). Robin's been kind of revealed in hidden ways, (Ep. "Fractured" and "How Long is Forever?") but Robin wouldn't be in an exact rush to tell would he? And I don't think Raven would be either, if they had revealed her name.**

**Anyway, thanks for reading!**

**~Abreu7~**


	4. Pairings

**Heres the 4th chapter!**

**Pairings**

The titans had just picked up their fanmail, and were eagerly leafing through it.

Beast Boy: Dude! Look at what I got! *holds up letter*

The letter read:

_Dear Beast Boy, _

_KISS RAVEN ALREADY!_

_Love,_

_Goldenheart11_

Beast Boy and Raven: O.o

Starfire: Oooh! Letters like that are recieved as well on Tamaran. They are made for the husband, and handed to him during the wedding as permission for him to marry. From whom are you wishing permission to betrothe Raven Beast Boy?

Beast Boy: *Chokes*

Cyborg:Like he'd ever get Raven's permission!

Starfire: *Confused*

Robin: No, Star. Its a fan who thinks Beast Boy should be dating Raven.

Cyborg: Yeah, the fans think they have the right to pair us up. Apparently, I'm dating BumbleeBee!

Robin: Isn't that obvious?

Cyborg: *Death glare at Robin* What do you mean?

Robin: *Sweatdrops* Nothing!

Cyborg: Kinda like all those people who think you should date Star?!

Robin: *Gulps*

Starfire: *Bright hope in her eyes* There are 'fans' who believe that me and Robin should begin the unbridled joy of dating?

Beast Boy:*Holds up one of Raven's dark blue letters* Check out _this _one!

_Dear Raven,_

_JUST ADMIT YOU LIKE ROBIN!_

_Love,_

_RaexRobin fan forever_

Raven: O.O

Cyborg: Ha....ha... *Bursts out laughing*

Raven: *Death glare* Really? *Holds up one of Cyborg's letters*

_Dear Cyborg,_

_You KNOW you like Bumbleebee!_

_Love,_

_A dedicated fan_

Starfire: Oooh! Examine my letter please! *Holds up pink letter*

_Dear Star,_

_Can I be at your wedding with Robin?_

_Love,_

_RobxStar forever_

Robin: *Turns crimson* Well...um...

Starfire: *Squeals with joy* Robin are you asking to be betrothed to me?!

Cyborg and Beast Boy giggled in the background, and even Raven had a small smile tugging on her lips.

Robin: Thats just the.....uh... fan's opinion Star.

Starfire: But perhaps in the future?

Robin: Uhh....*Holds up letter* Look at this one!

_Dear Robin,_

_I LOVE YOU! Forget Starfire, marry ME!_

_Your future wife,_

_Jenna_

_(See you soon, love.)_

Starfire: *Eyes burning with anger* Robin. Who. Is. Jenna?!

Robin: Just another fan, Star.

Cyborg: So how many couples is that so far? Beast Boy and Raven...

Beast Boy: *Wiggles eyebrow at Raven*

Raven: *Rolls eyes*

Cyborg: Robin and Raven.

Robin: *Turns to Raven and gives small shrug*

Raven: *Gives slight nod in understanding*

Cyborg: Robin and Starfire.

Starfire: *Smiles*

Beast Boy: Neh eh eh! You forgot, Cyborg and BUMBLEEBEE!

Cyborg: *Strained voice* Right.

Beast Boy: And on the computer, I've seen you with Rae too.

Cyborg and Raven: *Slight shudder*

Raven: My. Name. Is. Raven. **(Didn't we cover this in the LAST chapter?!)**

BEast Boy: Not done yet! You wouldn't believe how many are about you and me.

Raven: *Flaming eyes*

Beast Boy: MOVING ON!

Raven: *Smirks*

Beast Boy:Theres Jinx and Kid Flash too.

Cyborg: Isn't there one about you and STAR?

Beast Boy: What?! No!

Starfire: Pardon?

Robin: Nothing Star.

Raven: *Annoyed* Let's just say our fans have no right in our love lives and leave it at that.

Cyborg: Ok.

Beast Boy: Sure, but you know Rae..

Raven: *Smacks him upside the head*

Beast Boy: Right/

Robin: Agreed.

Starfire: Yes, but this includes Robin and this. This. JENNA. Correct?

Everyone: Yes Star.

Starfire: Oh joy!

And the titans continued looking through their mail, and maybe there were a few snide comments....

**TA-DA! Special thanks to Goldenheart11 for letting me use her name. The other names I made up, so sorry if thats your name. I tried to mention every couple (Except same gender ones, no offense) =D Thanks for reading hope you enjoyed!  
**

**~Abreu7~**


	5. Motivation

**Hey! I would like to thank ReadingRaven 019 and YoungTitan123 for correcting me. Raven's name really is Raven. Man, how'd she get caught with an awesome name and I'm stuck with my name?! *Sigh* Oh well. Anyway, here's the next chapter, made out of total boredom:**

**Motivation**

The titans slumped into the living room, exhausted after defeating mumbo.

Raven: Have you ever thought, whats the point?

The titans stared, surprised at Raven's straight forwardness, as she usually only speaks when spoken to, quipping at Beast Boy or explaining Starfire's confusing English.

Robin: The point of what?

Raven: The villians. If they do something stupid, we stop them. Why do they keep trying?

Beast Boy: 'Cause they want to win!

Raven: But if we don't stop them, the city does-

Robin: And if the city doesn't, the county does-

Starfire: *Catching on* And if they do not stop them, the state does the kicking of the butt-

Cyborg: And if the state can't, the country will.

Beast Boy: And if the country doesn't the aliens

Raven: *Glare*

Beast Boy: I mean continent does.

The titans: So whats the point?

Cyborg: Thats a good point Rae.

Raven: *Evil Eye* RAVEN.

Cyborg: *Waves hand* Sure sure.

Starfire: I must agree. The villians are the, idiots, correct? *Turns to Robin for confirmation*

Robin: Sure Star.

Cyborg: Maybe its for revenge?

Robin: But even revenge has a limit on a person's stamina.

Starfire: Yes, and everybody must know that the revenge is wrong.

Beast Boy: Uh, Star, theyr'e bad guys. They don't care if its wrong.

Starfire: Then they have no morals! Great X'hal, *Rapid Tamaranian*

Titans besides Starfire: O.o

Cyborg: Star, if you're gonna talk with us, do it in English!

Starfire: I do not believe that what I am saying would be allowed on a children's show. At least, not in English.

Beast Boy: *Snaps fingers* THATS the reason! This is all a TV show!

Cyborg: HUH?

Beast Boy: No, seriously! This is just a kid's TV show! We aren't even real! This is a G rated show shown on TV for entertainment, and we never run out of villians because than the show's rating would go down!

Raven: I think YOU've spent too much time watching TV.

Robin: Yeah Beast Boy, there's no way we're a TV show.

Cyborg: Gotta agree BB.

Starfire: Why do you not go and rest?

Beast Boy: *is being dragged away by the boys to the infirmary* NO! YOU GUYS! ITS TRUE! THIS IS ALL A TV SHOW!

Raven: Bye. *phases through floor to room*

Beast Boy: *Calls out from infirmary* THATS STILL COOL!

Starfire: Great X'Hal! *Hurries to infirmary*

And so ended, another chat with the titans.

**I really enjoyed writing this, and I hope you enjoyed reading it! Oh, and I'm considering writing another humor starring, of course, the titans! They start up an advice group. And, well, I'm sure you can imagine their respones to everyday questions. But I'm still considering if I should write it or not. Theres a poll on my profile, if you'd like to help me decide!**

**~Abreu7~**


	6. Books

**Hey! Heres another chapter! Ive been thinking about just wrapping up this story with 10 chapters at least. And then maybe add onto it when I've got extra time. Like I said, this is just a writer's vent for my writer's block but it keeps geting so many reviews I may have to make it an actual writing project.**

**Books**

Raven sat contentedly reading in the common room, when our favorite changeling Beast Boy entered.

Beast Boy: Hi Raven!

Raven: Hello. *Continues reading*

Beast Boy: Whatcha doin'?

Raven: *Sarcastically* Knitting a sweater.

Beast Boy: I thought you were reading.

Raven: *Rolls eyes*

Beast Boy: Whats so interesting about those dumb books anyway?

Raven: If you read one, maybe you'd know. Now let me read mine.

Beast Boy: I like comics better. They've got pictures.

Raven: Which is why they're called comics, not books.

Beast Boy: *Goes and sits next to Raven* Whats that about anyway?

Raven:*Annoyed*

Beast Boy: *Snatches book from her hand*

Raven: BEAST BOY!

Beast Boy: *Turning book upside down* What language is THIS? They're just squiggly lines!

Raven: *Yanks book back* Its Sanskrit.

Beast Boy: Sanwhat? Isn't that a pokemon?

Raven: *Irritated* SanSKRIT.

Beast Boy: Doesn't sound that interesting to me.

Raven: *Phases through floor to her room*

Beast Boy: Hmph. SOME people just don't like talking about books. *Leaves to his room*

**I just had to had to HAD TO write a BB and Raven chapter. I've had a suggestion to write one with Terra, and believe me I want to but I can't. SOME PEOPLE dislike Terra, and totally change her personality in their stories to mean, cruel, evil, manipulating girl(Which she ISN'T!). Besides, I don't think I could voice her very well. I thought about having one where they talk about Terra, but it'd be painful for BB and so many people dislike her etc. Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter of Chats!**

**~Abreu7~**


	7. Pairings Pt 2

**Hey! Here it is, and you can thank roughdiamond5 for this. She asked for a second part of pairings. So, here it is!**

**Pairings Pt. 2**

Once again gathered in the living room, the titans were watching the news. Robin very close to Starfire, Cyborg singling off to the side, Beast Boy attempting to near Raven and Raven ignoring them all as best as she could while reading.

News Reporter: And speaking of the titans who stopped Mumbo, there has been some mumbo jumbo on them! *Laughs* According to sources, leader Robin.

A small picture of Robin on his R cycle appeared on screen. Robin looked at the TV with new interest.

News Reporter: And bubbly alien Starfire

A small picture of a happy Starfire at a Save The Puppies fundraiser. Starfire smiles gleefully, and anticipates the next few words.

News Reporter: Are in a relationship together! Ooh lalala. And, apparently, our gray gal Raven.

A small picture of Raven, hood down, in the library appeared on screen, her giving the camera a slight glaring look. Raven glances up from her book. Starfire is snuggling up to Robin and making him turn crimson.

News Reporter: Has a thing for video gamer Beast Boy!

Beast Boy appeared on screen, at GameStop. He was checking out the Super Monkey 6 game. Beast Boy glanced at Raven, who glared back.

Raven: Not..

Beast Boy: Aww c'mon Rae,you kn-

Raven: My name is Raven. **(I'm pretty sure we covered this.)**

Starfire: Wait! They are still speaking!

News Reporter: And tech genius Cyborg seems to have shown quite an attraction to Steel City Titan leader BumbleeBee!

A picture of Cyborg and Bumbleebee arguing appeared on screen. Cyborg, who was just about to begin teasing, sank lower into the couch as the reporter continued.

Reporter: Theres more fans! At the gathering of titans a few months ago, **(Teen titans ep. Calling All Titans ending, with every Titan in Titan tower) **it was revealed there are several more heros AND couples!

Pictures of titans east, Jinx, Kid Flash, Hot Spot, Argent, Kole, Gnaark and several other titans appeared on screen.

Reporter:Its been said that Aqualad and Raven have a thing for each other.

Raven:.....*Small blush under her hood* **(ep. Deep Six involved Raven, Aqualad, and heart eyes.)**

Reporter: And bad girl Jinx is dating speedster Kid Flash!

(Somewhere, Jinx was watching with Kid Flash. She shot him a glare as he smirked at the reporter's words.)

Reporter:Crystal sweetie Kole is dating caveman Gnaark.

Innocent Kole appeared, staring at the camera as if wondering _Why are they taking a picture of me? _Beside her, was Gnaark with a lala land expression.

The reporter went on to say several couples. Some made the titan's face flush, and others made the titans tease.

Beast Boy: Cyborg and Jinx sitting in a tree!

Cyborg: Shut it you little grass stain. Or should I say, Raven's reject!

Beast Boy: *Face turns red*

Raven: *Glowers at Cyborg* Don't bring me into this.

Beast Boy: Yeah, and Rae's with Negative Man!

Raven: What? *Glare*

Starfire:*Saves Beast Boy* But I am not the girlfriend of Cyborg. Nor of Speedy.

Beast Boy: Yeah, 'cause Speedy's dating Raven!  
Raven:*venomously* Excuse me?

Robin: Calm down everyone!

Beast Boy: Sure, after you go on your date with Star! *Snicker*

Cyborg: *Chuckles*

Raven: *Small smile*

Starfire: *Smiles at Robin*

Robin: *Flushes scarlet* I thought we had agreed not to talk about this couples stuff.

Raven: Agreed.

Beast Boy:....fine.

Cyborg:Alright

Starfire: Very well.

And with that, they changed the channel to watch Tom and Jerry.

**I had some fun with this. Really did. ^^ Hope you enjoyed it! I hope I got the other couples in here. You know, everybody seems to love Raven. I've seen her with all the others in the main group, Aqualad, Speedy, and even with Jinx and Blackfire. I don't mean any offense to those couples, I just thought I'd point that out.**

**~Abreu7~**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN GAMESTOP OR TOM AND JERRY (And trust me, I wish I did.)**


	8. Gravity

**'ello! Heres the next chapter, and it was actually inspired by this wacky conversation me and 3 other friends of mine had. Even though I know you won't read this, thanks Stephanie, Tyshra and Selena!!**

**Gravity**

Robin: BEAST BOY! Did you break the vase im my room?!

A moment ago, Beast Boy had been nonchalantly playing video games while Raven and Starfire were each doing an expert level sudoku puzzle. Everyone paused and turned to Robin, who held a box of broken pottery as he stepped into the room.

Beast Boy: Dude, it wasn't me!

Robin: Then why is there tofu on the floor of my room?!

Beast Boy: *Ears droop slightly* But..it wasn't me!

Robin: Then who was it?

Cyborg: *Smiling evilly at Beast Boy* Oooh. BB is in trouble.

Raven: *rolls eyes* Really mature.

Cyborg: Well-

Robin: *Cuts off Cy* Who did it?!

Beast Boy: Weeeeell....I may have ACCEDAINTLY given it a little push but then it wasn't me dude! See, that thing gravy pulled it down.

Starfire:...I believe Beast Boy is speaking of the force on Earth which pulls objects down.

Raven: *Nods in agreement* Gravity.

Beast Boy: Yeah! Totally wasn't my fault! See, I gave it small nudge then gravy-

Raven: Gravity.

Beast Boy: Yeah, that. Then that gravelly pulled it down. Wasn't my fault!

Robin:So you're blaming gravity for your clumsiness.

Beast Boy: NO! I'm telling you gravity pulled down your vase!

Raven: Technically, gravity was pulling on the vase when it was on the table.

Beast Boy: SEE?

Cyborg: I wonder if gravity could pull BB out of the couch and make him fall.

Starfire: No, that is not possible.

Cyborg: Well, lets try this how BB did it. *Pushes Beast Boy off the couch*

Beast Boy: *Falls off and hits the floor* OW! Cy made me hit the floor!

Cyborg: _I _didn't. I just gave you a little push, it was gravity yanked ya down. *Smile*

Raven: *Gives small smirk*

Beast Boy: *Ears droop lower* But...it was gravity.

Raven: *Narrows eyes at Beast Boy*

Robin: *Bursts out laughing*

Everyone except Robin: *Stares at Robin oddly*

Raven: Mind sharing whats so funny?

Robin: Have you not heard the last few minutes of this conversation?

Everyone paused to recall it, then all burst out in chuckles, except Raven who restrained herself to a small smile. After their laughing fit...

Cyborg: So...what were we arguing about again?

Beast Boy: *Quickly* I dunno. Lets keep playing.

Robin: Oh yeah. *Stares straight at Beast Boy* Beast Boy broke my vase. *Goes and grabs Beast Boy by the collar*

Beast Boy: *Being dragged away* No! But duuuuude! It wasn't me! It was GRAVY! *Ducks into the hall*

Raven: Gravity.

Beast Boy: *Pokes head back in* WHATEVER! Heeeeelp! *yanked back into the hall*

Raven: *Smirk*

Starfire and Raven returned to their sudoku, and Cyborg contented himself with stomping the high score list.

**Hey! OK, so the conversation didn't go EXACTLY like that, but something close to it. Either way, I think it was definately funny. Bye!**

**~Abreu7~**


End file.
